Driving Vision Podcast – Conquering Impostor Syndrome with Ariah Daniels & Sheri Teodoro | Episode 161

I think just innately some of those things come from our own experiences or fear or lack of self confidence. And when you break through that is when you can conquer some of this impostor syndrome we're talking about.

Hey, everybody. Thanks for joining us for another episode of the driving vision podcast. Last week, here at the Ziggler Auto Group, our women leaders at the ZAG series featured a phenomenal session on conquering impostor syndrome. Two remarkable leaders, Aria Daniels and Sherry Theodora, led the charge in a powerful, vulnerable, and real conversation about what it means to own your seat at the table even when that little voice inside might be saying otherwise. Whether you're new in your role, a seasoned leader, or anywhere in between, whether in automotive or outside, this conversation will resonate.

Let's turn to Aria Daniels and Sherry Theodora for a conversation after the session. Hey, everybody. Welcome to the special edition of the driving vision future of Zach today podcast. And back with us today is a face we see often, Ariah Daniels. Welcome to the show.

Hello. Thanks for having me, Sam.

And we also have Sherry Tiodoro. Sherry, welcome. Hi. So, Ariah, this week, you held the latest episode or the latest class of women leaders at the ZAG. What the heck is that, and why do we have a class called back

for women thanks, Sam. So our women leaders of the ZAG is a group that we created last year, actually. So we've been rolling this for about a year and a half or so. And we initially started this group as a way for female leaders inside the organization to get together to educate each other, inspire, share experiences that we've had in both life and business, and ultimately just to support each other and help each other grow. So this week, we actually had a call on conquering impostor syndrome that, our dearest Sherry Tiodoro was able to share with our group.

So I'm really excited to dive into some of the big takeaways today that we took from this call and all left just feeling so much more inspired, to conquer some self doubt that we all carry.

Conquering impostor syndrome. Sherry, what is impostor syndrome? What is that?

So pretty much, it's the feeling of self doubt, inadequacies, feeling like you are not good enough, you don't deserve the position that you're in. Even though you've proven success or achieved awards, it's just that feeling that you are not good enough.

Where does that feeling come from? Because I think, you know, it's interesting in business. Evolution or becoming better or taking different roles, it involves a level of stepping into the darkness of the unknown of, like, can I really do all this a little bit and doing those things that you've prepared for, but you're not nobody's ever fully ready for that next role? Right? So so what what is what is that, and where does it come from, this feeling of impostor syndrome, Sherry?

I feel that it comes from something that happened in your childhood or early adult ages where a situation where you were embarrassed or someone made you feel not not good enough. It's like a trigger in your brain that it just makes you feel like this all the time. So I feel like everyone sort of has this feeling. It's just the way that you handle it and deal with it that you can overcome it.

Interesting. Are bet do better leaders handle that feeling better than others? Like, it seems to me if everybody has recognize it. I can correlate with it. Like, what's the delta there, Araya?

Maybe give us some perspective. Like, is there a diff are there better ways

of doing? Because that was that was probably one of the biggest takeaways that we all had yesterday is that reading through the responses. So in the beginning of these calls, we we send out questions just to help everyone to do some reflection on the topic at hand. And one of the questions was basically, have you dealt with impostor syndrome? Are you confident or comfortable, or do you feel like you have a little bit more self doubt in your role or just in business in general?

And every single person's response had something to do with there are times that I have definitely doubted myself. So this isn't just to say that, you know, one person or myself or you or Sherry deals with it. It is like a universal feeling. Like, for whatever reason, there are times that we step into things and we just sometimes question ourselves and we go down this rabbit hole of wondering if we're worthy or capable of doing something. And I think to Sherry's point, there's been a lot of research done that some of that stems from past experiences shaped perceptions of what we've we've gone through in life.

And some of that's childhood trauma and just different things that lead us to believe that when we're in those situations that, like, oh gosh, am I really capable of this? And you start to doubt yourself. So, yeah, it's kind of a universal thing.

Is part of a leadership role, like, helping others kinda get through it, develop through it, get to the other side of it?

Oh, yeah. Absolutely. And that was a big portion of the call that we had yesterday was just talking through, first of all, the feelings that we face in certain instances where we do feel those things and then the tools that we can use to overcome and conquer those feelings. And that was a big part of the conversation yesterday.

So, Sherry, how many were on that call yesterday? And then and and then you, Sherry, and then Araya, what are some of the common symptoms or signs of people who are experiencing impostor syndrome even if they themselves don't recognize it? Sherry.

There are probably about 20 to 25 women on that call yesterday. So quite a few. Mhmm. It was yeah. Good turnout.

We love that. And I feel like a lot of the commonalities are not being prepared. So if you're going into something, I feel like you should know the topic that's being discussed. You should be prepared before going in. And I feel like surrounding yourself with the right people and having the relationships with the correct people will really help your build your self confidence in going into something that you're scared of.

Yeah. And another point too is just constantly having the mindset to learn and receive feedback on things. So there was an interesting correlation between part of the conversation to Sherry's point about having a good relationship with the people that are around you when you are trying to deliver something or, you're showing up to give a speech in front of someone. Right? Like, or giving feedback to someone.

Most of the time, it's easier for us to receive and give feedback to a person that we have a better relationship with because then we see it as like, okay. This is a coaching opportunity instead of maybe taking it critically and then feeling worse about ourself and having more self doubt. So the relationship piece was something that came up yesterday, which I thought was just so profound to talk about, in in being able to conquer that impostor syndrome. It's just having good relationships with the people that you surround yourself with.

So I wanna ask more about relationships, and I wanna ask about the be prepared piece because it's interesting to me. When you say be prepared, before we go into relationships, when you say preparation, it seems to me like part of impostor syndrome might be that you can't be prepared. Right? Like, there are moments in our life, in our work where even after we've prepared all we can, like, you can't prepare adequately for everything. We go into some situations unprepared.

I guess throwing that out there. I don't know if you guys have any thoughts

on that. I have, you know, I have something to kinda rebuttal that. And Okay. You know, so preparation, of course, is a huge part of it. Right?

If you go into something completely unprepared, you're gonna immediately doubt your capability to show up in complete x y z. Right? But Yeah. So I'm a huge believer in doing hard things and doing hard things a lot so that when you continue to keep checking the box to say, oh, I did that. I did that.

I did that thing. Even if I wasn't truly prepared, like, I knew I got through it, and that helps callous your mind to know that you can show up maybe even a little unprepared and not have those feelings of self doubt. So I've always believed that that no matter what, yes, it's good to prepare. But the more that you show up to do things that maybe you're a little bit challenging or that you think you have some self doubt on, showing up and conquering and getting through that helps diminish those fears even more.

So can I just restate that? So part of being prepared is practicing doing hard things. And even if we're in a situation where we're not prepared, it gives us a reflex that allows us to handle that. Right?

I totally agree. Yep.

Can you can you think of an example of that that came up in class or that came up on the call or in life?

I'm gonna pick on Carol Lee actually, Carol Lee and Jessica both talked about the relationship piece or being prepared for certain things. But I think just in general, when Caroline talked about constantly and continuously improving and, you know, she's a service manager for, for our Lafayette store and just doing hard things, maybe having tough conversations with other people on her team that she helps oversee, the more and more that she's done those things helps her learn how to to deal with them moving forward. So she's done done more of those and had those hard conversations. And the more that she does that, the more comfortable she feels about having them. Kinda similar to Jessica's response too about the relationship piece, which was a good correlation.

Yeah. And on the other side of that too, if I can add that we all agreed that we don't know everything. We are never gonna know everything, and we're always continuously learning. So if you come into a situation where you aren't prepared or fully understanding of the topic, you may have some failure, but that's okay. Like, we are all going to be okay, and we're gonna learn from that.

So just take it as a growth opportunity to when you maybe feel like you didn't do your best, and just move on from there, and you'll be good.

What is it about human nature that, like, we're we wanna be perfect at everything we do. We wanna just show up in the, you know, perfect shirt, fully prepared, execute 10 out of 10 every day, but there's no growth in that. Right? Like, what is it about the human experience where we want perfection? But at the end of the day, we're not built for perfection.

We're built to hit our head and get back up, and that's growth. Like Mhmm. From physical fitness all the way up. What Mhmm. What is that paradox?

It's a little psychology. You know? I I think we're our own worst critic sometimes, and we fear maybe what others think of us or we fear of failure. We we feel, you know, being embarrassed in front of our peers or whatever it might be. But I think so much of that is in building your self confidence.

And one of the questions that we had yesterday was about kind of authenticity and thinking about when have you not been yourself or have you hidden your true self out of fear of judgment from others? And then we talked about some of those triggers. And I loved we have to share, Sherry. Cheryl. Cheryl Prociones, her answer was so awesome because she stated in one of her answers basically like, hey.

Personally, I've always known who I am. It was really instilled at me at a young age by my mother. And she basically said, if you don't like me or if you don't like it, then you can blank blank. I'm like, oh, that you know, it's just like but yeah. The the f word and you.

So she, it was just it was funny. Like, you know, we we laughed about it and had a chuckle, but that's just so Cheryl. And that's definitely goes to show Cheryl's leadership and who she is. She just owns fully who she is. And she, you know, she said this.

Sometimes she can be a little too direct, and sometimes people don't like that, but she knows she's that way. And she so she's never hidden that part of herself. And I just I just so appreciated that. I think just innately some of those things come from our own experiences or fear or lack of self confidence. And when you break through that is when you can conquer some of this impostor syndrome we're talking about.

Interesting.

No, I agree also. I mean, sometimes we all strive to be more like Cheryl and we've told her that too. But yeah, there are those times that you just kinda have to not be yourself to fit in. And I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. Like, she used the example of she's going to wear a dress, like, at a fancy dinner.

That's not her, but she's gonna do it to fit in, and that's okay too.

So it's interesting. That was one of my questions is what are a few practical tools or strategies that women in our organization, but really anyone can use to push through these moments of self doubt? And it seems to me, Araya, you gave one with practicing tough doing tough things. And then and and then Sherry, Araya gave another, which is who's your mentor? Who do you look to as someone who has that level of confidence that you can emulate, replicate, and grow towards?

Cheryl's a great one. Are there any other great mentors within the Ziegler Auto Group that show that? Not necessarily just toughness, but they handle that self doubt well and help others grow through it.

I think Araya is for sure one for me.

I love that.

Yes. Thank you, Sherry. Thank you. It's definitely something that I continue to work on. And I still, at times, doubt myself.

Right? And I think that just to the point of being universal, no matter just different situations we get into ourselves, sometimes we get into our own head and say, oh, am I really capable of doing this, or do I really have what it takes? You know? Yeah. But it that just, like, to my point before, because I I really try to focus myself on doing hard things, because I know that mentally builds my self confidence.

The more I do those things, the more it calluses my mind. So but to another point, to answer your question, Sam, and this really relates to question number three that we had yesterday was, what do you believe are your natural strengths as a leader, and how can you leverage them to become more influential and inspiring? So Yeah. To that question and all of the responses, everyone shared just different traits that they have as a leader or what their strengths were and leaning into those in order to conquer impostor syndrome and help others also get out of that. So I thought that was such a great point too.

Sherry, did did you have anything about question three or just that conversation we had about the strengths portion?

Yeah. Just knowing your own strengths can really help you, develop as a leader and just give you more self confidence. Just play on your strengths. Use use them as leverage to help your team out and grow your team and yourself.

Yeah. Yeah. For sure.

As we're talking about all this and I think about women leaders at the ZAGG and I think about different classes and initiatives and things we do, and I think about those strategies to overcome self doubt, how does the Ziegler culture, in particular, you think about our drive statement, you think about our mission statement, you think about all the things that we do repetitively, How does that culture help foster the confidence and growth for emerging women and everyone across the auto group?

When we were purchased by Ziegler Automotive Group, I've never had any sort of employer or automotive group that would help develop your personal strengths or even invest in in their employees for anything. So all these training classes are a tremendous help. Going to them as much as you can will really help you practice, face your fears, have you speak in front of people. It's just been a tremendous help for me.

So Sherry, Araya, before you share, this is almost an advertisement here a little bit, but I'm baffled. And I know Araya, we talk about this a lot. There are so many opportunities here at Ziegler for self development, for growth, for leadership. I mean, you're standing in a room with a national treasure, Jim Craig. Right?

He's the goalie. And, you know, we all talk about how hard something like that is, but the hard builds character and growth. And there are all sorts of opportunities like that. The biggest miss, it feels like to me as a Ziggler employee, is to not go to those. It's to not engage, not participate.

And you know what? Candidly, if you're that sort of person, you're probably not even listening to this podcast, so the message is on deaf ears. But I'm shocked at how many people just don't engage, and it's a shame.

You know, Sherry should share her testimony of going to her very first Jim Craig workshop.

They're terrifying.

To see her growth now, to see where she is now is just exactly why we do what we do. Right? It's exactly why

we do. Give it to us. Yeah.

So my very first, feeling of impostor syndrome that I really knew what what it was was my first Jim Craig workshop. I had no idea what to expect. I didn't know who Jim Craig was. I just thought it was going to be us sitting there. He was gonna teach us teach us things, and we would take notes.

But I soon realized that was not the case. And I walked into the room, and they were all, men in suits looking very important. I didn't know anybody. And I soon felt very small. I felt unprepared.

I didn't know what to expect or what was going on. And I just really wanted to find any way to get out of that room as fast as I can. I mean that was my imposter syndrome just kind of like taking over control of me. But I went through it. I didn't run.

I faced my fears and the it went fine. I then learned on my next gym card workshop, I knew what to expect. I was very prepared about the topic when I went in there. And just knowing all that helped me build my self confidence. I was more calm.

I actually won a jersey that day, which I was super proud of. And just having that accomplishment just builds your self confidence and grows from there. And then I ended up leaving a Jim Craig Hall, which I don't even know how, but that's just the growth that journey took me on.

So, Araya, it's interesting. That is exactly the reason why more people within the auto group should get involved and engaged. What's the obstacle? Why does it if if Sherry can, experience such growth, confidence, and overcome that self, kind of doubt, why don't more more people take advantage of it?

Yeah. You know? And I guess just to piggyback really quick because Sherry Yeah. Went through this workshop, and then she did the Jim Craig call. So she led a Jim Craig call.

She led our women's group call yesterday. So going through those things that were hard, she felt more comfortable yesterday showing up to lead this call because she's done the things that she knows aren't hard. And so I think that's such a a great testament to her story and just wanted to really hit that home and share that piece. But I think there's times that people don't, a, know what they don't know. And they're you know, I I feel like we do a pretty dang good job about sending out all the the different things that are available to anyone and everyone.

And I think sometimes people people might say, oh, I just am so busy. I don't have the time or whatever. And ultimately, it's gotta be a sacrifice you make to know that it's an investment in yourself. You've got to make and schedule the time for your own self growth so that you You gotta own it. Yeah.

So that you can just pour into everyone else. Yeah. So I think some of it is, you know, we could say all the excuses, but I think it's an just an accountability. Right? Like, we've gotta hold ourselves accountable to know I can attend these things.

I've gotta make time for them. If I wanna continue to see growth in myself, it's something that you've got to take hold of and own. So, yeah, absolutely. I think that's the biggest piece.

Well, it's very cool as we think about this class, women leaders at the ZAG, that you've showed the leadership to bring this group together. I think that's awesome. It's gonna be fun to continue to follow the trajectory of this class and see the strength and development of those who are involved in this because I think we're gonna see a lot more success stories. What's next for the women's leader at Ziegler series? What are the topics coming up next?

So we don't know. We usually end a call, and then it's next day. Today is when I kinda start thinking about what's our next topic. And so we'll meet again in September, but I typically wait a few days to see if anyone raises their hand to wanna bring a topic. And almost always, I try to just challenge the group out there to say, hey, is there a topic about or inspired to wanna share with our group?

And then we just help build that content out. So we don't have it yet, but it there is one coming, and we'll meet sometime in September.

So if if anyone wants to get involved, they reach out to you and and they can get engaged, get

involved for you. Talk to another female that you know that is, on these calls, and we'll just add you to our email distribution list and get you rolling, on the communication so that you don't miss the next one.

As a recap to this incredible conversation, Sherry's having a little bit of a technical issues. Otherwise, she'd come back in. But what would you say, Araiyah, to any women at the ZAG at any woman at at the Ziglar Auto Group who feels like she doesn't quite belong at the table despite earning her seat after this session.

I don't like hearing that. So in you know, it's funny because in my strengths answer that we had answered on our questions yesterday, one of my strengths that I I'm most proud of is being an. And I don't know where it comes from, but I've I've always wanted to help others feel included and feel valued and feel seen and heard. And no matter where you come from, no matter what stage of your role that you're in or you just started with us or if you've been with us for twenty years, you deserve a a seat at this table with us and to learn from others, but also that we can learn from you. So, that is an open invitation to anyone inside, our organization to come be a part of these calls.

Alright. Alright. Daniel, Sherry, Theodora, we appreciate you both being on the show. Thanks for sharing your perspectives, and thanks for continuing to lead at the Ziglar Auto Group both through these classes and the other things that you do. So thanks for being on the show.

Yeah. Thank you.

To Arai and Sherry, thank you for being bold, honest, and empowering. That's what leadership looks like at Ziglar. To our driving vision podcast fans, thanks for tuning in, and we'll see you next episode. Until next week, how are you driving vision today?